“Lock ’n Load”: the Enemy’s About to Attack!

We regulate cars and drivers more seriously than we regulate guns and gun owners. Almost free of federal restrictions, guns are used to kill one American every 20 minutes in this country. Every year, more than 30,000 people in the United States die of gunshot wounds; more than 60,000 are wounded. Sounds like a war to me.

“Put your weapon's safety to the on position, load your weapon with ammunition, and await further orders!” – from whom? Who is your enemy? Who do you to want kill? You want the thrill of shooting a living human being – or maybe a deer? How many bullets in your magazine? You’ll need the biggest magazine you can carry, plus an ammo belt, a grenade or two or three, a hand gun, and a knife just in case he/it gets too close. Smear your face with dirt if you have to, wear camouflage, hide behind something or crawl under a dead body, become invisible – just like in the movies. Got your assault weapon ready? They’ll take my guns “from my cold dead hands,” cried fearless Republican actor/NRA Pres. Charlton Heston.

When was the last time you or anyone you know needed a gun to kill somebody? Are you afraid the government of the United States might come after you? Do you really think you and your Tea Party friends could defend yourselves from the United States Army – or even a handful of SEAL Team members? 

Oh, you want to defend your home, your office, and your car. What if you walk into a drug store, or a bar, for that matter, and some guy wearing a hood tries to rob you? As exciting and nerve-wracking a moment as that might be, will you think fast enough to pull your handgun and pull the trigger without blowing a hole in your leg first? How much training have you had? Are you ex-military, ex-police? Will your husband or your wife or child get in the way? You’re experienced enough to handle that, I’m sure. How old should you be before you can carry a gun to school?

Nah – you’re just a gun collector, or a hunter, or a “sportsman” – killing animals is your idea of sportsmanship! You just want to be a good provider when the government takes away all your food stamps, or they run out of cows and sheep. (I hate it when that happens.) And besides, you really like that wild animal head-on-a-plaque on your office wall. Makes you look so, so macho! (Sorry, that might be a lion’s head, and we’ll need to remember what they looked like.)

The Tea Party probably does need to have heavy weapons; tanks in 2014! They seem to be under assault lately.